Haha - funny funny

Haplo · Joined: 20 Jan 2005 Posts: 2422 Location: Springfield, IL

What can I say, this made me laugh. Enjoy! I'm sure some of you have read this but this is great.

[i]True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.

"The moral of this story is:"

"Always keep your condoms in your car."[/i][/i]

chow · Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2005 5:34 pm Post subject:

:lol: How long do you keep them in the car? Isn't that like keeping them in your wallet? :wink:

Nikko · Joined: 20 Jan 2005 Posts: 536 Location: Northern CA

I have a couple of them to take to the Antiques Road Show. this is what happens after children.

chow · Posted: Wed Feb 09, 2005 9:04 pm Post subject:

This thread is going to get moved-you know that..... :P

Nikko · Joined: 20 Jan 2005 Posts: 536 Location: Northern CA

> A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked
> up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine.
> >>"What was that for?" he asked.
> "That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the
> name Laura Lou written on it," she replied.
> >>"Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura Lou was the name of
> one of the horses I bet on," he explained.
> >>"Oh honey, I'm sorry," she said. "I should have known there was a
> good explanation."
> >>Three days later he was watching a ball game on TV when she walked
> up and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet,
>which
> >>knocked him out cold. When he came to, he asked, "What the hell was
> that for?"
> She replied, "Your horse called."

Haplo · Joined: 20 Jan 2005 Posts: 2422 Location: Springfield, IL

Hahahahhaahhahaha

I pulled out my wallet the other day and put it on my desk. One of the guys in the office was walking buy and happened to notice my wallet, he looked, pointed, and said 'alllll riiiiiight' and I was confused.

:idea:

I figured out to put some stiff cards behind any particular items in my wallet now to avoid any obvious shapes poking through. I was a tad bit :shock:

chow · Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2005 1:54 am Post subject:

you know........ :o I'm 45 and have 5 grandchildren. :shock:

When will you people learn? :roll:

Please REFERENCE my last post on subject! :idea:

Thank you,

"Granny"
:idea:

chow · Posted: Fri Feb 11, 2005 1:58 am Post subject:

follow up idea, I have a Cat who would be a good method of birth control. She only meow's all night if she can't sleep right on top of a hip-or 2!

oh, and she maintain's ownership of any bed you might use in the house!

Haplo · Joined: 20 Jan 2005 Posts: 2422 Location: Springfield, IL

Sorry, I missed the lesson...

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